


Mistletoe Shenanigans

by Saraste



Series: FICMAS 2020 [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ficmas, Holidays, Kissing, M/M, Mistletoe, Nori has no boundaries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:08:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27818761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saraste/pseuds/Saraste
Summary: Which of them initiated the kiss is unclear, as they lean in at the same time, lips meeting somewhere in the middle with an audible smack.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield, Dwalin/Nori (Tolkien)
Series: FICMAS 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2034025
Comments: 1
Kudos: 32





	Mistletoe Shenanigans

**Author's Note:**

> Written for prompt "kissing under the mistletoe" by

'Oh. No,' Nori says, completely deadpan, looking up over his head at what is hanging from the top of the doorframe, maybe a foot above his face. His grip on Dwalin’s arm is unrelenting, if not bruising as he continues, arresting his fiancé in the doorway, 'A mistletoe. We _must_ kiss. Here, in front of everyone! How utterly embarrassingly _horrible_.' His tone is just right for it, but his face and body language are giving it all up.

'Absolutely vile,' Dwalin grins at him, catching Nori as the shorter male hops to wrap his legs around his waist (miraculously _not_ bashing his head open on any part of the doorframe), his hands going around Dwalin’s neck.

Nori grins back, his eyes bright, his body settling, octopus-like, into Dwalin’s embrace.

Which of them initiated the kiss is unclear, as they lean in at the same time, lips meeting somewhere in the middle with an audible smack. The kiss may begin shallow, but it soon becomes deep, maybe a little too much for company, and Dwalin’s big hands squarely holding onto Nori's backside are not entirely idle. Nori’s moaning doesn’t help to make it any more acceptable in company, even if said company is fully and completely aware of their penchant for engaging in somewhat graphic PDA. They are also seemingly completely deaf to the world, after a bit.

'Ahem. AHEM. Excuse me!' Bilbo finds his voice rising in volume and irritability with every repetition.

It is a moment before the two extricate their lips from one another’s and turn to look at him, who is… if not necessarily glaring, but tapping his foot at them in a very pointed way. He is standing two feet away and is sure that the tips of his ears are red, they surely feel like they’re burning.

'Was there something you wanted?' Nori asks, after the silence has stretched on for too long, his voice sounding rough with a breathless giddiness to it. Dwalin had pressed him against the door frame, which is a feat in itself, as he'd had to stoop some to do so. At no point had Nori’s legs left from around Dwalin’s waist or Dwalin’s hands from under his ass. They are still filling up the doorway under the mistletoe that’s brushing against the top of Dwalin’s bald head.

'Not anything particular,’ Bilbo says, his tone pointedly polite, but with ice underneath the surface, ‘only you're blocking the only doorway into the kitchen.'

'Oh, are we?’ Nori’s face is suddenly an image of amused mock-chagrin. ‘How rude of us! Dwalin, away!'

And Dwalin actually bodily carries him away into some obliging corner where they can finish whatever they have started under the mistletoe without anyone else having to see it. Nori may have been tempted to make a display of himself, but luckily Dwalin has at least an ounce of common sense and decency. Hopefully they’ll find a place where no-one needs to _hear_ them, either, but as Nori _is_ loud, that is maybe hoping too much.

Bilbo sighs and rubs his hand against his face, listening as Nori’s giggling retreat is finished with a door banging shut, thankfully. 'Right,' he finally says and moves to step through the doorway now unblocked with people who don’t know what all should be saved for the bedroom and not the eyes and ears of unwilling participants.

Perplexingly, there is an arm halting his progress, hairy and muscular, encased in a jumper sleeve rolled up at the elbow. An arm he knew. Of course, who else?

'Beloved…' Thorin says in his deep voice that still makes Bilbo’s body shiver and shouldn’t when they have company, but he had not been unaffected by the earlier display even when he doesn’t approve and didn’t need to see it, and spins him around, using the unfair advantage of his height and some nefarious trick with his arm. His intentions are clear and Bilbo very much wants to groan in frustration.

All Bilbo wants is to go into the kitchen and check on the chicken. Is that too much to ask? Apparently so.

'Thorin… is a man not allowed to go unmolested into his own ---' but whatever ese he’d meant to say is swallowed by Thorin’s entirely too whiskery kiss... which Bilbo could never deny liking just the way it is, thank you very much. The noise he made against Thorin’s lips is almost an exasperated sigh, but he gives Thorin what his foolish husband wants, even as he curses Kíli for supergluing the mistletoe over the kitchen door in the first place.

He does get into the kitchen in time to save the chicken from burning, but only barely. 


End file.
